Tuesday, December 2, 2008

I Don't Make Food in "Small"

I volunteered to bring the potatoes.

Grandma said that only the Atkinson family, the Chandlers, the grandparents and me would be at Thanksgiving this year, so "We won't need as much food as usual, I think."

Apparently I wasn't listening.

Potatoes were a three-day affair. I bought spuds, sour cream, garlic, milk and butter Tuesday night. I did, admittedly, already have all of these things at home, but... better too much, than too little, right? Wednesday was a torturous day filled with scrubbing. I like to make mashed potatoes with the skins on (WHY?! WHYYYY?) so I scoured the living daylights out of about fifteen pounds of potatoes for several eternities.

Next came the boiling. I HAD realized that I didn't own a pot--more like, a pot does not EXIST-- that would hold so many potatoes, but I had not foreseen that EVERY POT IN THE HOUSE would not hold that many potatoes.

I put in several hours of boiling, dumping and tasting (raw potato... not my favorite), then stabbing (the POTATOES, you guys!), reboiling, redumping, retasting... and sitting-on-the kitchen-floor-crying.

My cousin came over after work.

"What happened, silly?" he asked the tear-and-potato stained loony person.
"I'm making potatoes... for all of Ireland," I replied.

Well, all's well that ends well, and those potatoes DID end up crazy delicious. AND I've discovered the root cause of all of my insanity: genetics. When I walked in to the Thanksgiving feast with two huge bowls of potatoes, my aunts started cracking up.

"You ARE your mother!"

Apparently she doesn't make small, either...

A Huge Amount of Delicious Mashed Potatoes

"Several" potatoes
about 1/2 cup milk
1 cup of butter or 1/4 c for every 5 lbs of potatoes
garlic-- powdered or smashed-- to taste
8 ounces sour cream
salt to taste

Scrub potatoes. Dice and drop into boiling water. Let potatoes boil until they are soft when poked with a fork--no shorter, and no longer! Drain and mash. Add warm milk, butter, sour cream, garlic, salt, and whatever else your heart desires. Be prepared to never want to eat another potato, ever again, if you did the boiling step wrong.


Terina said...

Phhhhhaaaaa! You do very few things small. Like yo mamma.

Terina said...

And... and your picts go perfectly!

Danielle said...

Hahaha that's hilarious...and you're pictures are so cute! Some good memories there for sure:)

jsashby said...

haha, I did a recipe too! I say potayto, you say patawto. Does that work in this situation? I don't know

Jessica said...

That is super funny. You are dedicated to go to all that trouble. After like 2 hours in the kitchen on Wednesday I gave up and let the rest of my family worry about the food.